I have just wrapped up a very unique summer experience. I spent the past six weeks returning to my
roots. Our family packed up and headed
north, to Michigan, for the summer.
I was born in Detroit and grew up in the metro Detroit
area. I went to college in Ann Arbor (go
blue, that is RIGHT) and then headed to mid Michigan to begin my career. I always thought that I would move back to
the metro Detroit area, but then I blinked my eyes and it was 18 years later,
and I was still in a small city of about 50,000 in central Michigan.
I always wondered if we would remain there or move on. Periodically, my husband or I would be
approached about an opportunity in the great big state of Texas. Somehow the opportunity would always fail to
pan out. And then, one day, the stars
aligned to what I had conceded would be our destiny at some point. A year ago, we packed up and moved west of
Houston.
After living my entire life in the state of Michigan, I
willingly started over. I joined a new
gym, found a new church, and got a new cubicle.
I learned how to (best) navigate the insanity of Houston traffic. I acclimated myself to heat and
humidity. I lined up doctors and
dentists for the family. We got a bug
guy for the yard. And a pickup truck!
The first few months were really fun. I enjoyed the newness of discovering unique
businesses and restaurants, and I embraced the diversity around us. I loved winter without snow, or ice, or my Uggs. I was also traveling a lot for work, so I was
digging the choice between two airports and nonstop flights (no connections,
say whaaaaat?). It took me about six
months before reality set in. Wait, I
live here?
The end of the honeymoon period led to the beginning of my
grieving period. I started really
missing Michigan. I missed Superman ice
cream, cider mill donuts, and the vast European community that appeared to be
replaced by a massive Latin American presence filled with tamales and tacquitos. I longed for the familiar and even started
missing the change in seasons. Most of
all, I missed friends and family left behind.
And thus came my request to return to our company
headquarters during summer vacation. And
it was great. We did it all. Northern Michigan hiking, bike riding, and
cherry eating. Metro Detroit shopping at
local Polish delis. Boating the great
lakes. Sitting in my old cubicle. I was there when my family needed me, and
that felt so darn good to be there for them.
So now we return to Texas.
And what have I learned? If I
don’t take anything away from the experience, it would be a disservice!
1.
Nothing
is forever. There is so much I do
continue to miss, but I also recognize that things change. I have noticed differences in one year in the
places I used to frequent. Other people
have moved as well. Nothing in this life
is static. Staying in one place does not
come with any guarantees.
2.
You are
adaptable. I found that everywhere I
visited this summer, whether it was a small town in northern Michigan, our last
city, or the metro Detroit area, I felt comfortable with the thought of living
in any of those places. It’s what you
make of it!
3.
Change
makes you learn. It forces you to
grow and explore new things. And that is
so great for your own personal development.
It is exciting to get new ideas and challenge your norms. Moving is one way to do that.
4.
Give
things time. It is pretty normal in
times of change to resist, as your brain is wired to seek the comfortable and
familiar. I have been advised to give
our move at least 2-5 years to really get used to a different way of life, and
I am choosing to embrace the adjustment process in the meantime.
5.
Be open. I used to say that I would never live in
Texas. Well, here I am. And this summer, I was asked like crazy if I
was going to move back to Michigan. My
response is now “I don’t know”. Because
who knows what the future holds? I
choose to allow opportunity to come and not shut any doors preemptively.
6.
Human
connection is so important. It means
so much more than any electronic connection.
I learned so much about what was going on in the lives of my friends and
family in ways that I otherwise would not get on Facebook. It makes me cherish these moments to visit
and motivates me to call more often to talk!
7.
Focus on
the positive. It is easy in those
moments of doubt to get down in the dumps and think about all the reasons that
things are bad. I actually keep a list
on my phone of all of the things I enjoy about where we live and why. It’s great to revisit these and feed my brain
encouragement in those dark moments.
8.
You have
the power of choice. My husband and
I made an active choice to move. We
could have refused, or we could have left our company. But we didn’t. I always focus on knowing that if we want to
be somewhere else, we can make it happen.
I avoid playing victim, ever. It
does not accomplish anything other then going back to the dumps that I referred
to in #7.
So, there you have it!
Eight learnings from returning back to my roots for six weeks. There will always be a big chunk of my heart
in Michigan. And I am sure that if I
ever move out of Texas, I will be leaving a chunk of my heart there too. I’m just growing wherever I am planted!
